Life & Blah!!

The Evening Raaga!

2011-09-07T15:17:00.000+05:30

With the sun setting, the sky above me drapes itself in a beautiful golden yellow gown..its a blissful sight..i sat there absorbing the beauty around me, tiny droplets of water bring be back to reality and all of a sudden it is pouring heavily and nothing is visible except for the dense rain..I stand in my balcony enjoying the cold gushes of wish sending occasional shivers across my spine and slanted rain wetting my feet...i continue to stand there enjoying the monsoon and thinking about the sudden change that happened in a matter of few minutes.

As i stood there thinking about the beauty of nature around me...a lot of thought crossed my mind and with the pleasant thought some unpleasant thoughts passed through my head and from the blissful state of mind, i turned very gloomy..just like that..in a matter of few minutes..i was dispirited..just like the climate..our mood changes so suddenly...just a few moments ago i was thinking about the beauty of nature and its offerings to us and how destined we are to have this life..a life which has so much beauty around it...and how amazing His creation is, plants need us and we need plants and how we are all supposed to co-exists..but then the unpleasant thought entered my head, how we human beings are ruining it all to suit our needs and yet we fail to see we are ruining our self..we humans consider ourselves as a superior being and hence we go around destroying everything around us,instead of protecting it, we are cutting down trees and building lifeless tall towers all around us, pretty or ugly building who cares,how the building looks, as long as it gives us shelter and when we build more we can give shelter to our fellow humans in exchange for some money.

'Money' yes that's exactly wat we humans are so busy accumulating. Money that's the root cause to all the problems in the world..yes it is !!

It is used to measure how successful a person is, how well a person has done for himself - (irrespective of the fact if he lived happily or not, by default he is considered 'a happy man')...and that's just a small part of the big picture..Money is used to measure how powerful a country is..if a nations currency is weak then that becomes the poorer country and the countries with a superior currency value indirectly rule over it..Yes, like the olden days we still have kings, but in this era they are called Businessmen, who make the poorest section of the society make goods, to satisfy the needs of the middle section of the society, and the middle section of the society pours money in the business-men's treasury..so instead of paying taxes to the king we buy the things we need from the king. With the new age modern technologies,such as the Internet,the telephone etc, the kings think of ways such that they can make the poorest people in the world-not their country- do the work for them, but the cost of the product stays the same. The kings call it outsourcing and this entire process of outsourcing of work to the poorer countries helps in cost cutting for the richer nations and helps in providing employment to the people of the poorer nations. And this entire procedure is sugar coated and called Globalization. And everyone wants to have there hands covered with a lot of money. So that they can become superior to the others around them, in the society, so that they can outsource their work to the weaker section of the society. Yes, this entire outsourcing thing works really well, each one of us is outsourcing our work and making others work instead of us doing the work ourselves like getting a maid to do the household work..and its beneficiary for both the parties, the maid, she gets some money for doing all the house work for us and we get to sleep a couple of hours more so that we can slog in office that extra bit while our real bosses sleep in their country with the thought that work is getting done while they are asleep. So basically the world has become one huge factory where work never stops. And that makes everyone very busy - making money!

Thus we all so blinded about everything else around us..we don't enjoy the first monsoon shower we don't even wait to see the first flower bloom in spring..why am i talking about the first flower bloom that's too tiny!! we are so busy in our own self's that we don't even have time to wait and see that suddenly the world has become very beautiful..we don't even notice the dew drops on the leaves and how the sunlight makes the world look like a beautiful princess dressed in diamonds..how the grass looks so green after each monsoon shower..how the earth smells so intoxicating..how the little birds creep out of tree branches and spreads it wings and flies off, how the cows are always so steady and patient, never in a hurry..we are always in a hurry, to get somewhere..yes we are all in a hurry to get somewhere once we have gotten there we are again in a hurry to get to the next place and then to the next..we never have time to stop and look anywhere even if we walk past a spiders cobweb we don't even know it was there..we are all so very busy..

I don't know about everybody..but I do about myself..i m too busy with thinking about what to do next..yes i m too busy trying to figure out whats next for me to do..and hence i m missing out on every little thing that makes living worth while..yes in the pursuit of a happy and a bright future i m completely ignoring my present..i have wasted 2 years of my life trying to figure out what is best for me in the long run..but in the process i have entirely missed out on simple things that make me laugh until my stomach hurts..yes small things in and around us make life worth it..simple things make life and we are supposed to live it..but we all want to do is "make it huge in life!".

As i lay shrouded amidst all these unpleasant thoughts..somewhere in the background i heard the radio play 'the evening raaga'...i tried to concentrate on my gloomy thoughts,but i was pulled out of my misery and suddenly i was back to the present situation the rain had stopped ..the earth smelled fresh and the grass looked greener and it was swaying as the chilly breeze blew past it making it dance to the evening raaga..and just like that i was happy again!

Ghaploos

2011-09-05T19:41:00.002+05:30

My last post though agesback, did leave a few of my friends(who are the only readers I have :) )wondering what I really meant..basically pondering what was the purpose of thepost, well the answer to that being, Nothing!!..it was just a phase I was goingthrough and somehow I really related to the movie..it happens to me I gobonkers in those phases..I start finding meaning in everything I see..there wasa point when I was so lost in my head and I was trying to figure out thepurpose of my life..I saw the purpose of a tree but I couldn't find a purposefor my existence which I am still searching..well that's not thepoint..the point is sometimes I can be pretty bizarre!!

However, the purpose ofthe post isn't to state how nutty I can be..it’s actually not about me atall..it about my friends aka ghaploos(as one of my friends baptizedus). Why did he call us ghaploos..well for the simple reason friends are aset of people you can turn to at point in your life and they will be there.

Suddenly, all my friendshave moved to different places and I find myself at a loss.

I miss :

the evening chai outings in outrageously expensive places along with the long conversations,
the violin classes almost always followed by dessert hogging,
the dark temptation indulgence soon after lunch,
laughing hysterically at nothing all,
bullying n getting bullied :(,
formulating a strategy of how to get the best from a buffet,
miss talking about comic characters (have no one to listen to me now :( ),
spending an entire day in a mall playing Wii and hogging Japanese food,
going for movie marathons in a theater,
travelling 20 kms just to go for a walk,
sitting in the middle of the road posing for a photograph on new year’s eve..getting belted by cops ..doing insane things on an impulse and always having a gala time..no matter how crazy the idea was it has always been so much fun..

It’s like all mypartners in crimes have suddenly disappeared..It’s like an era has come to anend :'(

I miss you all for allthe great memories and thanks for just being there!!

PS : I ll start cryingin office..so I ll just stop before sadness engulfs me :'(

Julia

2011-03-05T03:51:00.002+05:30

For the first time I went for a concert where I got to sit down and didnt have to crane my neck just to get a peek at the stage..yes I got to sit in the VIP box..and guess who was playing.... "Linkin Park"...but for a short while I sat there I found myself envying the crowd standing and going all bonkers and missed the college days :) but the band rocked and I had a great time :)

After returning to my room I powered on the television(my biggest addiction.. can do without it, but if its there in my room and that too an LCD, how can anybody disrespect the 22-inch flat wide screen by not powering it on ;)..just my perspective..hehe!!). Anyway, the plan was to show it some respect and then sleep...but the characters in the movie caught my attention, Julie, her life was just as ordinary as mine, and then she goes on and starts a blog, (which is the reason I am writing today), which eventually brings her a lot of fame and etc etc..the name of the movie is "Julie and Julia". However, I wanted to share something else about the movie. I loved Meryl Streep's role,Julia.
I am neither a great cook nor am I fond of cooking, but I really liked her character, and her relationship with her husband, she is a confused person like most of us, and she tries out several activities just to keep herself occupied and tries her hand out in hat making, playing bridge, learning french and finally she tries out cooking, and finds her calling in that..and her goal was never to be famous or become a cook who would be remembered years later, but as the saying goes "Success follows excellence", thats what happened to her..I really liked the story..so just wanted to share...

Potpourri of thoughts..

2010-11-13T23:11:00.003+05:30

The last time I wrote it was in December last year its been a year since the last post however, on several occasions I did sit down to write something, cos I did have a lot on my mind at those times, but somehow I never really got around to writing something and posting it. However, today I just opened this page and started typing, though I don't really have have anything specific to write about, am pretty blank actually.

I'll start with narrating my day..maybe something triggers the thought process and I might just land up writing something interesting enough for the few people who might read this...
Sat and worked all day, was stuck with a bug..phew..and by the time I was done, I missed the roommates dinner party, my violin class and also my favorite subway of the day..sounds pretty disappointing..though I am disappointed, the bug did get resolved..saved the day from being terrible to just being disappointing :)

Last night I rearranged the bed and table such that, when I sit on my chair I have the open view of the street and the building opposite to mine, but I also have a pretty good view of the sky..and I can feel the nice cool breeze blowing in and brushing against my face..this year surprisingly Hyderabad weather is very different from the past years..generally, the scorching heat kills..but this time..the days are cool and cloudy..and there is a nice constant breeze..it just elates my mood...and the nights are just as pleasant, it drizzles sometimes, and the breeze gets chilly, yes its actually a little chilly here, I am finally being able to use the 2/3 sweaters that i have :) This year the city might just have winters for a change :)

Its been a little more than 7 years since I first came down to the Southern part of India, back then to me just like many North Indians, South India was just one big state..but now I have had the chance to live in 2 of the 4 states. Its been a very pleasant experience, before coming for my college to Bangalore, I was in Mussoorie(also called the Queen of Hills, its in Uttaranchal) I went to Mussoorie when I was in class 5 and was there until i finished my school. Mussoorie is a cold place, most of the year is cold unlike the south. In Hyd we cant escape from sun and in Mussoorie we would go basking in the sun..and keep shifting our spots as the sun moved..haha!!

I still have no particular idea as to what is it that I really want to write about..but suddenly feeling very nostalgic..could be what my friend calls it quarter life crisis..the first quarter of my life has been good, have learnt a lot over the years, though I have made many mistakes I am glad I made them, they were my mistakes. There is a saying that goes "Life is too short to make all the mistakes", I know its good to learn from others mistakes, but I feel the fear of not making mistakes holds us back its more like we try to control ourselves from giving our very best, well thats one theory, the other is, if we try too hard not to repeat others mistakes we will land up making a whole bunch of our own mistakes anyway :) Up until now, the only rule or saying that i truly believe in is "Change is the only constant", my sister had told me this sometime during my teens, and its stuck since then, change is never easy and though I am very impulsive and not a routine person, change isn't easy at all, change is probably one of the hardest things, but then again, change is good, it opens us to a whole lot of options which we wouldn't have cared for if it went for change :)

And with that thought I will end my random rumbling post. I hope to write again soon..cos each time I write I realize how much I have missed writing :)

The Bus Journey

2009-12-19T04:33:00.003+05:30

In any new city, what better way to know the city than the local bus, so when I first reached Hyderabad and started exploring places on my own..i started taking a whole lot of different buses to reach the same destination.

One other thing, people in the city are awfully helpful.

So, those days I was staying in a place called Gandhinagar in Secunderabad, really far from where I work, so I was looking for a house somewhere closer to work. So as usual, I reached the Secunderabad main bus stop, and waited endlessly for the bus to Kondapur 10 H, after hours of waiting, when I got into the bus I realized that I had boarded 10 Y instead of 10 H, (10y goes to Kukatpally)..however, it wasn't that big a deal, the two places are pretty close to each other..what I didnt know is that this bus went via Lakdi ka Pool train station (here the local trains, MMTS, are nothing like Mumbai locals, here there is enough room for everyone).

Now that I am done with the set up..I will continue my story :)

So, first of all I boarded the bus and when the conductor came to collect the ticket I told him "Kondapur", he gave me this worried look and spoke in good english, "This bus goes to Kukatpally and not to Kondapur, however, I will give you a ticket for Cyber Tower, from there you can get a bus to Kondapur, dont worry, I will tell you when we reach there." smiled and handed me the ticket. I was completely fine with that suggestion, I wasnt very familiar with the city then. So, when we took the right from Basheerbagh and then the left to Lakdi ka Pool, I spotted the train station, the train is way faster. So I decided to get off the bus. As stood up, the conductor called out loudly "STOP!!!, why are you worried girl, I told you, I will tell you when to get off the bus, please sit in your seat and dont leave your seat, we are pretty far from your destination stop. I opened my mouth to say something, by then the bus started moving, and I thought, "Wow! this guy is way too nice..ok for his niceness sake i will get off only in Cyber Tower."

I had no idea how long a route this bus actually took, however, since I had made up my mind about the journey, I thought of indulging in one of my favorite past times 'Observing people' :) In a crowded place if you are sitting all quietly and paying full attention to people who think that no one looking at them, its really funny to see what people do, thinking that no one is watching them..haha!!

Just then my co-passenger, asked, "Are you new to the city?", I said,"Yes.", she said,"Ok, I will tell you about the different stops, my stop is only two stops away.", I replied,"That will be very nice, thank you!", and then she told me a little about herself life her college, her parents and how she love the city, I just listened to her with occasional 'hmms', 'really' and 'nice'. Her name was Anita, who was then studying in Osmania University, and her parents were both teachers. From herI learnt that "Irani chai" is a specialty of the city and everyone must try it once from the guy who sits under the big banyan tree in Charminar. By then her stop came and we bid good-bye.

Then a lady in full black dress came and sat next to me along with her two children, who were also sitting on the two seater..phew it was cramped up, noisy and all I got in return for my smile from the two little children and the mother were cold stares, eventually one of the children fell asleep on my lap..phew! so much for the cold stares I thought :). But just then I couldnt help but think of the beauty of our lives, no matter what background, no matter what religion, somewhere we are all connected as one huge family. They got off after 6 stops.

Then came a old lady to sit next to me. She kept looking at me, and the moment I caught her eye, she would look away. This continued for sometime until I ignored her completely and started looking outside the window. Finally, she tapped my shoulder and said,"Are you Aruna's daugther?", I replied,"No", then she said,"Are you local to this?", I said,"No", she said,"Where are you going?", I said,"Kondapur", she enquired,"But this bus goes to Kukatpally, hmmm you should get off in Cyber tower.", I said,"Yes the conductor told me so". Then she went on to say how bus passes are way better that buying a ticket every time. She told me a lot about her family and the friend she was visiting...and all in the talking she was doing she said something about how the IT crowd had improved the city, also how she appreciated the young people staying away from their homes to build a career here...in all that she said she had a friend who owned a women's hostel in Kondapur. She gave me her friends number. My stop came and I got off the bus.

When I returned that day, as I was recapturing my day I realized, unknowingly I had gotten to know a little more about the city - and its famous Irani chai, how in the heart of hearts we are all one - religion is just a division brought about by us and on some level felt accepted in the new city - by the people already living here. I didnt take the hostel because I wasnt looking to live in a hostel, but yes, I also learned that the people in the city are just very nice and helpful.

Then I thought occurred to me:
Life too is like a bus ride, we meet different people in different stages of our life, to make the journey more enjoyable and to learn from them, each person we meet in our lives in one way or the other becomes a part of our life, but we must ride on as long as we reach our destination.

Still Lost..

2009-12-19T02:49:00.001+05:30

Sitting on the terrace on a warm summer evening and I can see the golden orange sun look at me one instant and in the next it disappears, playing hide and seek. Its rays are flooding the sky. The clouds are in no particular pattern yet staring at the sky is such a bliss.

Now, the Sun's gone, i am left in solitary with the wind, as it caresses my face, questions start flooding my head, questions to which i have no answer yet. I look up at the sky and see a flock of cranes flying North, a sight of beauty. I look across I see an aeroplane with flickering lights. Indeed man has made things of such beauty and convinience, things that resemble nature given to the fact exploiting nature in almost every aspect it can. It has always occured to me, why do we do so, then again, I know I am a very part of the exploitation team myself, my existance is based on it.

The wind brushes over my face again and its cold touch is thrilling and relieving in this warm summer evening. It seems to be trying to tell something but i cant hear, there is just too much noise. Its a pandemonium of sounds, all kinds - drilling, hammering, the engine, dogs barking all at ones. The noise is deafening, yet when i look at the coconut trees swaying in their gentle unaffected by anything harmonised with itself, I draw an parallelism by thinking of them as people who know their purpose in this world. Thus I think of myself and how i still dont know what my purpose is, I have no idea as of what is it that I really want, I dont know what my heart wants, it doesnt give away anything and my mind is unable to draw conclusions of questions I ask.

The Fun we had..

2009-12-15T02:00:00.004+05:30

Its been a while since my second post..the past few days have been crazy, I have been working like a dork, working with little rest..dont know why I do that..never mind!

Several things have been happening in the country like : Andhra being on fire with people fasting and the crowd going wild, people in Boroland and Gorkha land beginning to think, starving unto death is the way to petition for a new state..haha..the political drama..phew!! It would have been a good humorous read, only if it weren't real..alas!!

Christmas and New Year is round the corner, the year 2009 is coming to an end..gosh..this year was pretty dramatic with Obama taking office as the first black president and being awarded the winner of Nobel prize for peace, the stock market improving from the crevasses, Swine Flu, accompanied by - Cleanliness is next to Godliness slogan..haha!

However, with the year drawing to an end, I generally turn a little nostalgic, so today I will tell you something that happened a long time back :

This is something that happened to me long back in the March of 1999 when I was in a boarding school. This year was not like the other years, this year we were not allowed to play with colors on Holi because our principal was very angry with our class, reason being we were way too mischievous for her..huuhaahaa(evil laugh!!), however, it was sad cos we were the only class in the entire school not allowed to play with colors :( ..we were grounded..phew..what a jerk she was!!

On the day of holi, after breakfast, when the colors were being distributed, we were locked in our rooms..how terrible of the ruling tyrants!!

But...having friends in other classes always helped (in the corporate world its called networking..haha)..ok returning back to past... so some of our friends from the senior and junior classes were so kind to share, their share of colors with us...bless them!!

Now that the entire hostel was outside playing with colors, our nannies unlocked us and we were free to roam around in the hostel premises....

Just as we were set free we all went wild...

It all started with a simple bindi on each of our faces and then someone splashed color on one person and screamed HAPPY HOLI and in a fraction of a second we were dancing in a cloud of colors.

As soon as we ran out of colors we brought in our own supply of powder, cream, surf and water..It sounds crazy..I know...and it was completely insane. The bathroom was in a huge mess..the walls were splattered with colors and the curtains which were once cream colored were now red and blue and pink...we were completely drenched and the floor was slippery we were falling on each other and yet we couldn't stop laughing..haha..gosh! it was way too much fun.

It was indeed one of the wackiest holi!

Later when our house mother returned and she saw the mess of the bathroom..she lost her temper(expected reaction)..well that's a another story of how we were punished to scrub the bathroom floors and walls until is was spik and span..let me not mention my principals reaction ;)

The Incident..actually Accident!

2009-12-03T23:42:00.002+05:30

Well after my introductory post I haven't written anything else, the reason being I never felt there was anything to write which was good enough to be published, Yes each time I was reminded of the fear of everyone reading my post gripped me. However, I did have a lot of things to write about. For instances I wanted to write about the menace of driving in Hyderabad(where traffic rules are not really followed..and when the traffic light is turning to red, instead of breaking people accelerate..haha!! I totally hated it and complained about it constantly when I was a new driver..but now I cant complain any more..haha!!). However, this post is about my first day when I got my car, and the very important lessons that I learnt that day, which I will never forget :)

I still remember when I got the car..Gosh! I was super excited. At the time I was living all alone in a 3bhk, and was waiting for Ma to come and join me..I was real excited about this whole thing(most of my life I have lived outside my home..been in a boarding most of the time). However, thats not important, the important thing is I was getting my car..Yaieee..I was wo..super duper excited :).

Anyways moving on, I got the car on the 1st of Jan 2009. Drifting into past [Flash Back ;)]..I was watching TV at the time when the car carriers called and said "Madam, Can you please tell us the exact location of your house, we are coming to deliver your car"...I was watching something very intently but now when I try to think what was it that I was watching I cant recall..I was flooded with instant excitement. Anyways it took those guys 2 hours to find my house..phew!! my enthusiasm level was beginning drop. However,when they showed up..I was so excited that I didnt have the time to wait for the lift. I took the stairs instead, I slipped, and my awesome Moto rkr went flying in air and THUD! it landed..I thought its gone for good..but 1st of jan was a nice day for me :) I wasnt hurt, atleast I didnt feel any pain..I ran downstairs. Paid those people and bid them good bye. In all the excitement of having got the car I totally forgot a very important fact..the fact being "I was a terrible driver!"

I hadnt ask those people to park the car inside the garage..At that moment i realized that "I had never parked a car EVER!!" But the brave soul that I am I sat at the drivers seat and started the engine and entered the buildings parking lot and with the zero intelligence in driving that I had I didnt see any complexity in parking the vechicle, even when that large white pillar stared right back me..I didnt bang right into the pillar..i just didnt think of it as an obstacle then...however when I actually got to the task I faced so much difficulty..everything seemed to be coming in my way..the wall, the pillars in the front, the pillars in the back..phew..but I managed somehow and banged the bumper on the wall and scratched it royally..'Gosh..that didnt go that well', I thought to myself, but somehow nothing could dampen my spirit of getting the car.

I returned to my flat and all I could think of then was "Hmmm..how will I take it out of its current location" what should I do to avoid another scratch? I couldnt think of anything else. So I decided to take it out for a spin...and i took the car out of its current resting place and didnt hit anything..just when I was begining to celebrate that I took such an intelligent turn that i scratched my cars right door completely..phew!..i was upset when I looked at the damage but little did I know what lay ahead.

Just when i was heading towards the main road I decided I needed some 'vaseline' (gosh!!what a want..however) the 'awesome driver that I was then, I didnt think it was important for me to break and stop at the side..I kept driving without looking at the road and BANG!! I had hit a parked motor bike and my left side of the car had climbed the footpath..Boy!! was I screwed..hell ya!! Those people completely got onto me, they would hit me I thought..thank God I am a girl they didnt dare touch me. But they said things like they would call the cops and all bitter things. Gosh..I was shit scared and I couldnt think and I had tears in my eyes. Luckily two nice people came to my rescue. And I paid 1700/- for that rickety old bikes repair and servicing. That was an expensive mistake..phew!

But that day I learnt 5 important lessons : 1) Always focus on the road while driving no matter how good I get 2) Never crying in front of a bunch of losers, they dont care about my tears 3) Never step out of the car, I am safest when I am inside it 4) Its NEVER my fault, never accept my fault 5) Dont stop, just RUN!

I can never forget that day and what I learnt from that incident.

After that I have had loads of adventures with my car and the cops and the RTA (transport office). But they are a different story.

I was terrified after that incident to drive but I wanted to be a good driver now more than ever before. I kept trying I made loads of mistakes, but each time I made a mistake I made a mental note of it, and never repeated it.

Several days later, one of the two gentlemen who helped on that day asked me for a lift. I was like its a pleasure, that day he told me "I really admire your guts girl. Even I met with a accident like yours one day and after that I never tried again, I am always dependent on my driver. Its really nice you never gave up. I think I should try to learn once again" I was speechless, I had never felt so proud of being just plain old me :)

Yes, it been almost a year since I started driving and now I can proudly say I am an awesome driver(for real now) and I love driving!

Life and Blah!!

2009-11-22T21:48:00.005+05:30

Two of my good friends have been asking me to blog, they think I have potential..heh heh..So, I have decided to give it a shot.

Life and Blah!!...Gosh...thats definitely not going to be the title of my blog..I couldnt think of anything interesting now and its a required field :)

Well, that definitely was the 'Blah' part of it..heh heh!!

Life..well..its a whole other discussion..isn't it!

As I have noticed in most blogs there is a theme, to what the author intends to write..most of them are about the way in which they are leading their life..Well, I guess this isn't going to be any different either, its just going to be a different person, and about 'Life as I see it'.